It's Just Not Fair
A very good friend of mine, V, has been an unofficial 'auntie'/mentor to two siblings from Milwaukee. The girls' mother is in jail; the father is virtually non-existent. The oldest girl - N - did not graduate high school, has a baby, and lives with her drug-dealing boyfriend. The younger of the two siblings, S, just graduated high school this year at age 19.S has been at home, taking care of the house, her two younger siblings, and her nephew. S asked V if S could come and live with V and her hubby for the summer. She needed a break, needed to be away from the family, needed stability.
V & hubby said yes. S got there last week. So far, S has applied for multiple jobs, been sweet and friendly, and run errands with V and enjoyed the company.
S signed up for two summer school classes; she was also going to volunteer somewhere while looking for a job. The agreement with her staying for the summer was that she would have to either take classes and volunteer, or take classes and work, or keep busy in SOME regard.
S's first summer school class started yesterday. The same day she was offered a job. The same day she found out she was pregnant.
GAH!!!
S has been pregnant before, but never carried to term. Unlike her sister N, S didn't intentionally try to get pregnant, and doesn't really want a baby. However, she feels strongly against abortion and will most likely try to have the baby. And because her job would be part-time, she wouldn't have health insurance. And the county that V lives in doesn't have the same health coverage for uninsured people that S's town does, so she may need to leave classes, leave her job, and go back home just to have health care.
This whole thing sucks. S is trying hard to make a new start. V is trying hard to help. Not to mention, V has been trying to get pregnant for a year now with no luck, so this is hard from that perspective, too.
I think what gets me most is that this could have been prevented. Easily. Yes, accidents happen, but they're a lot more likely when you're not diligent about birth control.
I'm not trying to suggest that having kids ruins your life, and I'm not saying that being a single mother ruins your life. But when you're 19, with no job skills, no familial support, no job...it's certainly not easy.
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