Corporate Peon: Welcome Home - Saturday Night


Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Welcome Home - Saturday Night

We got to the bar around 11, knowing it would be a late night for us. We had tiki torches and the keg all ready to go back at the house.

Back to one of the college bars - this time, one of J's good friend's gfs came out with us. She was 30 and a lot of fun, and I was so glad to have someone else with us. She actually reminded me a lot of Nanner - Robin was such a beautiful girl. Long, straight blonde hair, great teeth, beautiful smile, killer sense of humor, and an accent...yep, maybe I liked her just for her similarities to Nanner!

The beer gardens were open and a decent cover band was playing, so it was a pretty good time out. We left at close and went back to the house. After-hours, dontcha know! I can't touch on all of the weirdness from the party - there were too damn many - so here are a few:

There is - or was - a tree stump in J's backyard, just off the deck. The guys decided to take an ax to it. Then a chainsaw.

Then they lit the fucking thing on fire.

Nothing like a bonfire at 3am on a warm summer night.
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There were 4 girls there besides me. One had a bf, one was J's hoochie; one we'll call Brandy, and one we'll call Tricia.

Well, Tricia was being hit on by two of the guys. She ended up fucking one of them. First in the bathroom, then in MY room. I was pissed. I interrupted early on and told them to get the fuck out, but that didn't work. Then I told them to stay the fuck off my bed and out of my things.

That worked. How do I know?

Well, the guys went around the house and looked in the window at them. There they were, going at it on the floor.

Well, that, and the video camera that was recording in the room guaranteed it, too.
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Tonia & Brandy & I were out on the deck, talking with the guys. Tonia ended up flashing the boys; Brandy held back. She was afraid that she'd offend me. I told her I've seen tits before. Shocking, no?

Well, Brandy wasn't easy. Oh no. She had her rules. Someone had to name a Quad City (where she's from) before she'd flash. Yep, saw her tits too.

I refused requests to show my own tits. I know, that is actually shocking.
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When LoveChild (seriously, that's his nickname) and Tricia came out of my room around 6am, he took one look at me and knew I was pissed.

So, he tried to give me a hug.

"Hell no! Don't you dare touch me. I know where your hands have been." He said he'd be offended but that actually insulted Tricia more. "I don't give a fuck who that offends, your hands will not touch me."
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I fucked with the drunk boys quite a bit. Ah, yes, drunk boys. Sometimes it's so fun to pick on drunk peeps. These were not the smartest guys around, either, so it was really easy.
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There was a duck calling contest.
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Good times? Well, I wouldn't go quite that far.


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