Corporate Peon: Damn the Birds

Friday, April 01, 2005

Damn the Birds

Middle of the morning delerium. Makes me think back to when I sent cookies and porn long distance; things can certainly change quickly, so enjoy it while it lasts.

If I were a coffee drinker, I'd bundle up, make a cup, and sit on the balcony watching the sun come up. Another new day, another new promise.

Things that are said are disguised so as to not offend, not alert, not upset. Still, though, they're so obvious to me that I wonder if the disguise wears thin to all. Just remember, I got there first. That will always be mine.

It wasn't the slight; it was in how it was slighted. I'm always wondering, watching, comparing. I always come up short. Others picked that up instantly; you...not so much.

Night has been bringing back its demons lately. I knew it would; they're never gone for long. I stay up to thwart them, but I'm weak. Things are so much easier in the daytime. Easier to avoid, easier to forget, easier to push them away and fill their spots with brighter thoughts.

I'm figuratively walking a thin line these days. What I don't say is equally as important as what I say. Hidden meanings are everywhere, and I speak double-speak like a champ. Sometimes my actual thoughts scare even me.

The day has dawned; back to bed.

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