Corporate Peon: Dear _____,

Monday, June 13, 2005

Dear _____,

I'm not sure if you've noticed a change in me or not. But I've become a little...bored with our relationship. It doesn't really change much, does it? I give you my thoughts, feelings, jokes, tears, and you just sit there and take them. It doesn't matter if I'm frustrated with you or with something else; your response is always the same.

I'm not blaming you; just stating the facts. I've been kind of lax with my other relationships, too. I'm not putting as much into them; in fact, there are a few I could name right now that I've let slip. Not for any particular reason, but just because...I don't know that I care enough to continue. That sounds terrible, doesn't it? It's not that I don't care about them, it's that...I've just lost interest. Momentum. Sympathy. Yeah, that still sounds terrible.

I don't know if those on the other side have even noticed, but if they have, I feel badly. It's nothing personal, it's It's not them, it's me.

I've been having trouble lately putting words around my thoughts. I've been having trouble lately putting thoughts around my feelings. I think I've even been having trouble feeling. I don't know; nothing's changed but something's changed, you know?

It's hard when people ask how I am, for I don't rightly know. I mean, nothing's wrong, but again, something's wrong.

No, of course there's nothing you can do. I just am feeling unsettled right now, and felt I needed to explain. No, not quite explain - more like, explore? I don't know. Maybe I just needed to rant a little.

And that's what we do. I rant, you take it. It usually works for me.

It won't always be this way. Right?

Powered by Blogger