Corporate Peon: Hoohah!

Sunday, August 14, 2005


Folks, buckle up and sit down. I have another night with Lois Lane to report on. This event included nipple rings, alcohol, many, many men (some in uniform), and lots of lumps and bumps.

I arrived at casa de Lane around 5pm on Saturday. Hung out with the fam for a bit - gave Mr. Lane crap as usual, met Chip of the long-lost-yet-returned cat fame (see her July 14th entry), and talked to the kids for a minute.

We didn't hang out at home for too long as we had places to go and men to see! Our first stop was a nearby fire department, where Lois is a known entity. We talked with a couple of the guys until they got a call and then hung around talking with one of the guys who stayed behind.

Oh man, let me tell you, was he snackable. Pierced nipple and all. He was sexxxy. Mmm. After wiping away the drool, Lois & I continued on to the main event - dinner at the VFW.

The event last night was a dinner for the C battery who had just returned from deployment. Translation - a lot of soldiers. A lot of soldiers in uniform. A lot of soldiers who had been deployed for 15 months.

Lois was the personal invite of a man I'll call Willie. It was easy to see that he was one of the most respected men there by the attention the other soldiers gave him. Based on only a few hours in Willie's company, it was well-deserved respect. He generally cares about the boys, he's funny, interesting, kind, generous, and he's very charming.

Willie kept us company in our rightful spots by the bar where we got to ogle many men in their quest for thirst-quenching beverages. As a result, some of the liquor found its way to me. I'd say it found its way to us, but Lois has an alcohol allergy that prevented her from partaking. I had her back, though, and did her shots for her.

Clayton, a very yummy soldier, bought me a Yagerbomb. Willie bought me a shot or two of McGillicuddy's. I found a new favorite drink I'll call a cherry cheesecake - mmm.

Lois and I, people watchers that we are, had some prime material. The lady - and I use that term loosely - who apparently uses other things loosely. Looking at her, you'd almost think it was cold in the bar. The drunk wife of a soldier who made my day saying 'cocksucker' and then bragging that she could spell the word faster than she could say it. The head honcho who everyone thinks is an ass, and who spits when he talks. The very very cute soldier who talked to us about German porn. Another very very cute soldier who told us drunk tales of Cubs games in Colorado.

I thought one soldier tried to pick me up with a cheesy line, but once he found out that I wasn't actually from there and I wasn't actually familiar to him, despite apparently looking so, he left.

Afterwards, we returned to the Lane household. I had entertained the thought of staying over and going to the picnic and parade today, but my own bed was calling my name. I still can't shake this damn cold and with my trip this coming weekend figured sleep is the best bet. There is talk, though, of meeting Mr. Lane's n'er-do-well brother. He's apparently a rebel without a cause or a clue - in other words, just my type. Whether or not that materializes, I'm sure there will be more Lois - Peon gatherings in the future. We'll keep you posted!

Powered by Blogger