Corporate Peon: Rules of the Establishment

Monday, March 21, 2005

Rules of the Establishment

Rule #1: You like what you read? Great. My sincere thanks for stopping by. You don't like it? Move the fuck on.

Rule #2: I will write what I want to write, when I want to write it, about whomever I want to write about. You know why this works? Because you're afforded the exact same privilege. I've said it before, and I'm forced to say it again: This is MY site. What I write here is for ME. It's MY means of relieving stress and exploring ideas and thoughts.

I will continue to NEVER use real names. If you see something written here that you identify with, maybe it's because I'm writing about you. Maybe you inspired the post. Or maybe - just maybe - it's because people are similar, and it's not even you I'm talking about. I know it's a shock, but I do have a (small) life outside of BlogVille. Not everything is about you.

I'm fully aware that not everything is about me, either. Very little is. But - and this is key - this site is COMPLETELY about me. Every single thing that happens here. Every single word. Mine mine mine. Please reference Rule #1 if you have questions.

Rule #3: Under no circumstances is your pity warranted. It's not asked for or encouraged. Pity the veteran begging for cash on the street. Pity the mother who lost her daughter to SIDS. Don't pity me, because it's not needed. I have a good life. I'm aware of this. I still choose to bitch and complain and drone on at times, and for that, I refer you back to #2.

Rule #4: You are never, ever entitled to tell me what my site said or did if that's not what my site said or did. If I said that X is a monkey, then I said X is a monkey. Don't tell me I said X is a turtle. And if I never said X is any sort of animal, don't tell me I did that, either.

Furthermore, you are never entitled to tell me that my perspective about something involving, impacting, or upsetting me is wrong. If I say something made me feel a certain way, you are NEVER entitled to tell me my point of view is wrong.

Rule #5: You are, however, ALWAYS entitled to disagree. Comments will be turned on and off at my discretion. However, you always have the choice to email me about my posts. Do so at your own risk; I can be a mean motherfucker when I want to be. If you do email or comment, be polite.

Rule #6: I'm an angry girl. I'm a pessimistic girl. I'm bitter and sad and cynical and distrustful. You want sunshine and flowers? Go somewhere else, cause I ain't promising none of that here. As always, everyone is welcome, but everyone is also welcome to leave.

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