Corporate Peon: Dear _____,

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Dear _____,

I know you want to have kids. You've always wanted to be a mom, you've always known you would be. There's no doubt that you'll be a great mother.

I just don't understand why you want to have kids with your husband.

You told me yourself - he thinks breastfeeding is disgusting. He doesn't want a baby, he wants a toddler. He doesn't want you to get fat or to gain weight. He'll be fine with the kid once it's, say, two years old. He's not thrilled with the idea of having something whiny and cry-y and wet around, 24-7.

So do you really think making him a father is such a good idea?

It's true that I've never thought he's good enough for you. But you seem to be happy, and even though your husband is a whiny, juvenile, selfish, anti-social guy, your happiness is my first concern.

I'm sorry that I can't get on board with your pending motherhood. And I hope you forgive me for silently crossing my fingers in hope that he's not allowed to procreate.



Powered by Blogger